Them jokes
I had the BEST day EVER.
1: I woke up.
2: I met someone I'm sad about.
3: I had fun and got them back again online.
But sadly the order was 2nd, 3rd, 1st... XD
A man is telling his story to someone. "My friends always said that they would kill me if I wore Gucci or Supreme. On April 1st, I wore both and conversed with them."
"Interesting."
"That's the story of how I got to the morgue," he says to The Gatekeeper of Heaven.
People want to be nice to each other because they only have one life, and they want to live it well.
Sucks to be them. I'm a cat.
How do you make Alabama cookies?
Put them in a big bowl and beat for three hours.
Two men walk into a bar. You’d think at least one of them would have ducked.
Where do you think all the orphans went?
In the World Trade Center, I trapped them in so they can finally get to their parents.
What do orphans, parents, and a ball have in common?
If you throw them, they both will never come back.
Roses are red, violets are blue, Fortnite is dead, so are you.
(I have no friends because all of my friends play Fortgay, just like my friends all of them are gay.)
Your earlobes are so big, you can fit your mom inside of them 5000 times and still have room for more!
I have some black friends who hate it when I say the N-word around them, so I got a pet monkey.
A Japanese man goes to the dentist. After being there for a while, the dentist asks, "How often do you floss your teeth?"
The Jap said, "After every meal." When they finish up, the dentist turns to him and says, "You need to floss your eyes more. I can still see them."
Q: What is the difference between Americans and Africans? A: Some of them have food, and some of them don't have food.
People, when your lover cheats on you, do this!
1. Start a conversation. 2. Say, "What's that smell?" 3. They will smell around. 4. Say, "OMG, it's a b****," and walk away and ignore them.
What moans about women but wouldn't exist without them? A triggered menimist.
My grandpa warned people the Titanic would sink, but they wouldn’t listen, so he kept warning them. Then he was kicked out of the theater.
My mate caught me sniffing his disabled sister's knickers the other day. It wouldn't have been so bad, but she was wearing them at the time. It made the rest of the funeral so awkward.
Why do orphans like pedos? Because it's someone that loves them and they can call "daddy."
Sometimes women are like bad snacks. People try them and then chuck them in the trash.
What’s the difference between apples and orphans?
One of them has a family tree.
How is a beer can and an Indian the same? You can find them both smashed on the side of the road!