Wanna hear a funny joke? Well, that was why you were here... Here's the joke: Your life :)
That Jokes
Yo mama's so ugly that even Hello Kitty had to say goodbye.
How to make an orphan BLEED?
Step 1 - Tell them to clap until they actually have a loving family.
Step 2 - LAUGH EVILLY as they BLEED.
Step 3 - Tell them to kys.
Step 4 - Leave that mental asylum.
A friend of mine tried to annoy me with bird puns, but I soon realized that toucan play at that game.
What do you call a mouse that doesn't like being known about?
Anonymouse.
A man opened a snail farm.
He said that it is a slow-moving business.
Sans: Zzzzzzzz
Papyus: SANS WAKE UP!!
Sans: What is it dude?
Papyus: A human has fallen from the surface world!
Sans: And you gotta BONE to pick with 'em??
Papyus: Grrrrr....
Sans: Oh come on that was a real RIBTICKLER.
Yo mama so ugly that when she was born, the doctor looked at her face, then at her butt and said, "Twins!"
Kobe would still be alive if he would have gone to jail for raping that girl.
What do you call a blonde in a freezer?
Her parents called her Cindy, so we should probably continue calling her that. She was supposed to graduate tomorrow.
I once had a cat that reminded me of Doug Ford.
Fat, mean, and probably inbred.
Jeff asks, "Did you hear about the guy they call the flash?"
Bob responds, "No, I haven't. Do they call him that because he runs fast?"
Jeff replies, "Nah, they call him that because he doesn't wear pants."
When I was a kid, I used to read a lot. I mainly grew up reading stories by Shakespeare, especially the story Romeo & Juliet. That one in particular taught me a valuable life lesson. It taught me to not be surprised when my girlfriend killed herself.
An orphan made an Instagram. He did not know what that symbol was on the bottom left hand corner.
A bus is a vehicle that runs twice as fast when you are after it as when you are in it.
Did you hear that Michael Jackson once got food poisoning?
He ate 12-year-old nuts.
Man: Cow milk is drinkable.
Other man: How do you know that?
Man: *smiles with milk all over mouth*
Other man: John...h-how do you know that!
My mom tells me to stop with the suicide jokes, and I replied with, "It's not that deep."
Your hairline is so far gone that it looks like someone dropped a nuclear bomb on it.
Yo mama is so ugly that your dad has to be drunk to bring her home.
