That jokes
I know why nobody likes my comments, because they got no sense of humor. That's why they dislike it. Now I know depression is a joke, a joke that never gets a laugh. =[ WHYYYY NO ONE LAUGH AT MY JOKES?
So you're saying a penny is worth more than a penny?
That don't make no cents.
My superpower is that I can create life.
“If you're a dwarf and you're offended by that, grow up.”
When an orphan takes a selfie, is that their family photo?
I just donated $100 to a blind children's charity, suck that no one will see it.
My wife and I have decided that we do not want children.
If anybody does, please send me your contact details and we can drop them off tomorrow.
I went to school with a gay guy who was really smart, but he always got mad that he got straight A's instead of getting all the D's.
You're so cool that celebrities take pictures of you.
Your forehead is so big that it was used as a billboard.
An apple a day keeps the doctor away. Or at least it does if you throw it hard enough.
Why is it that if you donate a kidney, people love you? But if you donate five kidneys, they call the police.
My senior relatives liked to tease me at weddings, saying things like, “You’ll be next!” They stopped once I started doing the same to them at funerals.
Do not sort... that's bad... *sigh in depression*
You know how divers jump off a cliff and land in the water well...
Emos do that too, but when they jump, they don't land in the water.
Teacher: Anyone missing?
Orphan: My parents.
Teacher: Something that is real, kid.
Orphan: My family.
Teacher: OMG, out of my classroom, kid!
Bro's chin looks like it's from that movie cartoon named Kronk. No wonder he got stung by a bee and took an ibuprofen to reduce the pain, but instead it grew longer.
Me to friend: I'm homeschooled.
Friend: If I was homeschooled, I'd kms.
Me: Oh, I already tried that.
Question: Did you know that "diarrhea" is hereditary?
Answer: It "runs" in your jeans!
Random person: "What's one thing your ex gave you that you can't get rid of?"
Man: *Shows a picture of his child.*
What's better than a pile of dead babies?
One that's alive in the middle that has to eat its way out.
What did the duck say to the drug dealer?
Gimme some of that quack!