That jokes
Why did the Twin Towers fall exactly at 9/11?
Because the terrorists thought that it would be fun to call 911 as a "prank."
I was going to tell a joke about a mirror, but it seems that I'm looking at one.
Me: You know your parents were very good people.
Orphan: Wow, I didn’t know that.
Me: I know, you're an orphan.
My wife saw me hit the best drive yesterday with my golf clubs.
I must have drove that chihuahua 300 yards.
poop i eat it for dinner i eat it at night yet it never comes out of me? how is that possibul?
pOOp
What does a waiter in a Chinese restaurant call a customer that won't leave a tip? A "plick."
What do you call a guy in a wheelchair that walks into a fire?
Hot Wheels.
Some people could say that the sky was falling that day,
one second they saw the sun and the next they saw heaven.
My dad said not to touch this thingy called a gun, but I looked down that pole and pressed that thing, and now I'm in heaven.
Your forehead is so big that NASA went to discover Mars, but then they said, "Oops, wrong planet. Mars is smaller than this, we will discover it later."
What's worse than having a comedian as president? Having a president that has dementia.
I was listening to some Drake in class.
My teacher shouted to turn it off. She then exclaimed that "Drake is mid and his music is very Pessi!" I didn’t understand the meaning until I checked the dictionary and realised it is a synonym for overrated.
Your hairline is so long that sometimes even the president doesn't know where it ends.
Yo mama so vegetarian that she loves the Vegan Teacher!
Yo mama's so fat that when Legolas killed her, Gimli counted her for two.
What do you call a house that isn't a house?
Not a house.
You tell your dad what one plus one is and he says five. You forgot that your dad's brain is on the floor.
Yo mama is so fat that when she steps on a scale, it says "to be continued."
You're so skinny that your mom had to use a whole shampoo bottle on your head, but she still couldn’t find you.
When someone says don't talk back to me, say, "I wasn't aware that answering a question was considered talking back."