There are 10 million million million million million million million million particles in da universe that we can observe.
Yo mama took the ugly ones and put them into one nerd.
One thing that Miles Morales and Black men have in common is that they're both rip-offs.
Yo mama so disgusting that when she took a shower, the water turned into ditchwater.
You're so ugly that when The Oh Hellos saw you, they were like "Oh Bye!"
Me: *sprays some perfume on myself*
Friend: Omg, that smells so good! You’re so aromatic, how do you not have a bf yet?
Me: ... I’m aromantic and aromatic. I do not desire romantic relationships with others although I do enjoy carrying lovely scents with me.
Your mom is so dumb that somebody told her, "Go get a life," so she went to play Super Mario and got a 1-up.
When someone says don't talk back to me, say, "I wasn't aware that answering a question was considered talking back."
Your balls are growing too big that they will pop like a balloon!
Why did the Twin Towers fall exactly at 9/11?
Because the terrorists thought that it would be fun to call 911 as a "prank."
What were Paul Walker's last words?
Hey, that tree's growing!
Your hairline is so far back that the United States got a front row seat!
"Brandon, tell the teacher that I'm with Ms. Polack."
My friend Nickiya wanted to know what animal she'd be. I said that she would be a "Ni-cat-a."
I was gonna tell you a pun about a bin but,
bin there, done that.
Yesterday, I saw an advert with a random woman dancing, and someone said that they were beautiful.
And then I said, "Except the fat people." And then I got sent to my room for saying that.
Did you hear about the volcano that was accepted into Cambridge?
It was a decision on the number of degrees it holds, which is a lot, because volcanoes have lava if they're active. And ours was.
Person: Hey, do you know what's the best thing in life?
...
You do realize that I said nothing, right?
Me: Exactly :)
What do you call a rocky formation covered in meat?
Meatcanyon.
(Meatcanyon is actually a YT that has like 1M subs so watch some of his content if you want to, lol!)
A: Guess what kind of men/women do gold diggers like?
Q: One that has a sense of money.
Did you know that dogs started the street craps game?
