That jokes

How can you tell that a website was made by an orphan?

It doesn’t have a home page.

"Yes, officer! It was a requirement to run over that child. It matched perfectly with the beat drop!"

A woman has twins and gives them up for adoption. One goes to a family in Egypt and is named "Amal." The other goes to a family in Spain, who name him "Juan." Years later, Juan sends a picture of himself to his mother.

Upon receiving the picture, she tells her husband that she wished she also had a picture of Amal. Her husband responds: "They're twins. If you've seen Juan, you've seen Amal."

Yo mama is so ugly that the Grinch fell out when he saw her!

I've thought about suicide, but there's always been a part of me that knows I wouldn't be able to live with the decision.

What did the blind kid say after touching the emo kid’s hand?

“I ain’t reading all that.”

Bin Laden’s kid comes sad from school.

“Dad, I got an F in Geography class!”

“Why is that?”

“The teacher asked me what’s the tallest building in New York and I said ‘Empire State Building.’”

Bin Laden waits a moment and then replies, “Let dad handle this one.”

People say that Pakistan is a terrorist nation...

Guys, it's not true, even Osama bin Laden lived there peacefully for 6 years.

If your corona test shows two lines, is that then positive or negative?

What is the most noise that comes out of a ladies mouth? Nothing because they never have anything important to say.

You're so cool that celebrities take pictures of you.

You're so awesome that the word 'awesome' demanded its title back!

You're so brilliant and bright that the Sun wears sunglasses when you're near!

How do our brains remember that we forgot something, but we can't remember what that thing was?

The interviewer asked me if I had a criminal record when I was requesting Australian citizenship.

I replied, "No. Is that still required?"

If a pregnant emo kills herself, is that murder-suicide or just abortion?

“If you're a dwarf and you're offended by that, grow up.”

Did you hear about the woman who broke up with the man who had a small penis?

When his friends ask how he’s doing, he said, “I wasn’t that into her.”

This is how big cats were named.

"I HATE BIG CATS. THAT ONE IS A LIAR, THAT ONE IS A CHEATER. THE ONE IS A POO-MA."

"Lion. Cheetah. Puma. You're getting a promotion."

Did you hear about the woman who put her husband’s ashes in a burrito?

He gets to tear that ass up one more time.