Teenager jokes
When I was 17, my mom’s door was always locked. I wonder what she was doing.
Why did the emo kid try [to] high five the tree?
So it can hang him.
What do you call a flat chested emo girl?
Cutting board.
Why do teenage girls hang out in odd-numbered groups?
Because they can't even.
The fact I couldn't hear the announcements at my school because the boys in my advisory are clapping with no hands should be a joke just in itself. They were making sexual faces as well, oh, and don't forget the moaning they do.
Question: Why does my teenage brother wear a cape to bed?
Answer: Because he can't sleep in his race car bed...
An emo girl dyed her hair red.
Where does her hairline start? Her wrist.
What does an emo kid say to his best friend?
"Let's hang out."
*School Shooter Walks In*
That one kid who plays "Pumped Up Kicks" at max volume.
Can emo kids get happy meals?
How did the emo kid compliment the other emo kid? He said, "I like your cuts G."
How many emo kids does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
What do you call a gang of emo kids?
Our teacher told us to write a story about the life of an object that's not alive, so I wrote a story about an emo kid.
What is the same with emos and orphans? They both are unwanted.
A teenage girl got a summer job dogsitting for a gigantic English Mastiff. She spent hours with the dog, and walked a little funny when she got home.
"What are you doing all day?"
"Knot a lot."
What did Sally get for her 18th birthday? A brick.
Why did she get a brick? She hit 18.
An ugly, poor teenage girl found a genie lamp in her backyard. The genie said, "I will grant you 3 wishes, but under 1 condition."
"What is it?" she asked.
"After I grant your final wish, you have to have sex with me," the genie replied.
"Okay, for my 1st wish, I wish to be the prettiest girl at my school," the genie snapped his fingers and made her pretty.
"For my 2nd wish, I wish for my family to be rich," the genie snapped his fingers and told her her family is now the richest in town.
"And your final wish?" the genie asked.
"I wish I had a sabertoothed vagina."
What does a kid with cancer and a house fly have in common?
A life expectancy of 15-25 days.
What happened when the depressed kid went to give it a high five?
It left him hanging.