Teenager jokes

Harry Potter is a movie about a grown adult man with an unhealthy obsession with a teenage boy.

What happened when the emo went through the self-checkout?

Two beeps went off.

I got detention yesterday because I told the emo kid to "Hang in there."

POV: Wine Taster in hell.

I was sitting with the best wine ever made on the table in front of me. This silhouette begins to speak, "You have risen to be the most superb Wine Taster on Earth. Then you got run over by a truck hauling freshly made wine to a warehouse. Your crimes are as follows: you left your high school prom date with another man after you got her pregnant, you let your mother believe that the cat ran away after you drowned it in the pool, and you never got married. How do you plead?"

The man looked at the silhouette like it was a purple rabbit.

"Guilty," said the man, "but if you would be so kind would you at least tell me what the wine in front of me tastes and smells like? I will take any punishment you deem fit."

"Very well," said the silhouette, "but you will regret that request."

Out of the shadows comes a boy only looking 19 years old. The boy says, "I will you taster today. I am confident about my sense of taste." The boy takes the first bottle and opens it, pours it into a wine glass, and swirls it around. He then takes a sniff and begins to drink, to the Wine Taster he says, "Mmmm, taste like chicken."

What does an emo kid and an apple have in common?

They both are hanging.

This emo kid wanted to join a group of emos, but he didn't make the cut.

What's the difference between a Catholic priest and acne?

Acne comes on your face after you turn 13.

Remember kids, if you're in a big problem, yell SHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEËEEEEEEEEĒEEEEĘEEEEEEEEESH!

Why did the teenage girls travel in odd-numbered groups?

Because they can't get even.

What's the difference between a Catholic priest and acne?

Acne waits until you're 13 to come on your face.

What do you call an orphan when there 18?

Homeless.

What happened when the depressed kid went to give it a high five?

It left him hanging.

What do you call a flat chested emo girl?

Cutting board.

Q: What did one emo kid say to the other emo kid?

A: Wanna hang out?

What's the difference between my father and acne?

Acne waited for me to be a teenager before coming on my face.

when you see a depressed kid, you walk up and say "wassup my lil barcode"

Why do apple trees like emo kids?

Because they like to play yoyo with them.

Why should you always give an emo a high five in the hallway? You can’t leave them hanging.

What's the difference between a pope/preacher and acne?

Acne comes on your face when you're 13.

What did one emo kid say to the other? "Nice cuts, G!" (because they like to cut themselves).