Teenager jokes
So a lady was walking down the street with two bags, and one of the bags was leaking $100 bills. A cop pulls up and he says, “Ma’am, ma’am, your bag is leaking hundred dollar bills.” Then she says, “Oh, thank you. I wonder how long that’s been going on.” And the cop says, “Before I help you, may I ask why your bag is leaking $100 bills?” And the lady says, “OK, I’ll tell you. So I live next to a stadium, and I have this beautiful rose garden, but these dumb teenagers always try and pee on the rosebushes. So they stick their junk through the fence, and I grab their junk. I said, ‘$100 dollars or it’s coming off.’” The cop says, “Oh, OK, well what’s the other bag for?” And she says, “Well, not all of them want to give me $100.”
What do depressed teenagers and fruits have in common?
They both hang by something.
Harry Potter is a movie about a grown adult man with an unhealthy obsession with a teenage boy.
If R. Kelly was a therapist:
14 year old: I hate my life.
R. Kelly: I feel you.
How do you get the emo girl out of the tree?
You cut the rope.
What has only one sense of style?
An emo girl.
Why do an emo's parents not let them cook, because they are afraid they will cut themselves?
What do you call a group of depressed kids?
A suicide squad.
What's the difference between a Catholic priest and acne?
Acne comes on your face after you turn 13.
God made Adam and Eve have sex right out the gate.
Then he made teenagers horny... yet here we are with a so-called "rise in teen pregnancy."
What does an emo kid and an apple have in common?
They both are hanging.
What do a 14 year old and the fetus inside her both think?
"Man, my mom's going to kill me!"
Ayo Lucas, a sussy baka!
Kid: I'm hungry.
Dad Bot: Hi hungry, I'm dad.
Teenager: I'm Hitler did nothing wrong.
Dad Bot: Hi Hitler did nothing wrong, I'm dad.
Nazi: Finally!
Which falls faster, an apple or an emo kid?
The apple, because the emo kid is hanging.
"Our teen has decreed we are the 'Worst Parents Ever.' We will hold our coronation ceremony to accept this honor next Friday. Invitations to follow."
What is an emo kid's favorite song?
"Chain Hang Low" because he hangs low off a chain tied to a tree.
What do you call a flat emo?
Cutting board.
What do you call a group of depressed teenagers?
Suicide Squad.
What is the difference between acne and a priest?
Acne waits for a boy to turn twelve before it comes on his face.