Technology jokes
The orphanage was open in apps, but I didn’t see the home button.
When I went to heaven, I saw Steven Hawking standing there. I asked why he isn’t in heaven yet. He said there are stairs.
I didn’t know Stephen Hawking died. Oh god, it must have been when I disconnected the Wi-Fi!
Friend: My mum took my phone from me, and I really want it back.
Me: Yeah, well, Hades took my parents from me, and the funny thing is, I don't want them back.
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Your forehead is so big that you dream in 4K.
Why don't Japanese people like iPhones?
Because they are afraid of American airdrops.
Why don't churches have Wi-Fi?
They can't compete with an invisible force that actually works.
When you still there?
When is the last time you picked up the phone?
My Xbox has been acting up lately... So I painted it black to make it run faster.
When you’re hiding from the school shooter next to people who made fun of you for having an Android: “HEY SIRI”
I made a website for orphans, unfortunately it doesn’t have a homepage.
What does Michael Jackson and an Xbox have in common?
They're both turned on by kids.
Mom: Don't forget to unload the dishwasher.
Mom: Did you finish your homework?
Mom: We are going to your grandmother's house for Thanksgiving.
Mom: Dad and I talked. We are getting a new car next month.
Son: You are?? Oh my gosh, thank you!
Mom: No, I was just making sure you were getting my texts.
Son: That was cruel!
What is the difference between an American and a computer?
An American doesn’t have trouble shooting.
Guy: Are you a vending machine? Because you're a snack.
Girl: Your card got declined.
Guy: That's ok, you got to bang them a few times to get you money's worth.
I made a website for orphans.
Unfortunately, it does not have a home page.
Yo mama so clueless, she dialed 911 on the microwave.
Are you Wi-Fi? Because I think I am finding a connection.