Newest Surprise Jokes - Page 4

I saw a pretty girl walking outside. I asked for her number. We met up and began to have sex. She told me to turn over which was weird. I felt a stinging pain in my ass all of a sudden

When you realize your friend is standing next to you is adopted and narrates everything he does

What did the boy with no arms get for Christmas I don't know he still hasn't opened it yet

Jack and Jill went up the hill to celebrate their marriage.

9 months later they happily had some use for their baby carriage.

2 years later they went up again then their daughter had a brother.

But 1 little secret that no one knew was that Jack and Jill share a mother..

Twitter just blew my mind i was havin a blast until i ened the stream with a bang

Today, I saw my friend go crazy eating her ham sandwich. When she went to the bathroom,I checked inside her ham sandwich and there was fresh drugs.

I also got mine replaced, hehe, I have a special surprised for you UwU

Male and Female
Non-Binary
Impossible to tell under all the
machinery and tubes
GENDER IS IRRELEVANT
MEATBAG, I HAVE RE-
PLACED MY GENITILIA
WITH A NEUTRON LASER

Why do we call it dead bodies? Nobody says alive bodies! like you walk into your workplace, "OMFG ITS FULL OF BODIES! Alive ones tho." You wouldn't give birth and say, "Come on husband, help me with the bodies." If its a surprise party, you wouldn't say, "QUICK, HIDE THE BODIES!" And the person who the party was for wouldn't say "OH MY GOD WHY ARE THEY DEAD!"

There was a orphan once and someone knocks on his door and said "hello son come and hug me" but the orphan says "excuse me who are you?" and the guy says "you dont remember me im your dad" and then the orphan says "fine then if your really my dad, come inside and let me asked you some questions" and the man says "ok then but i am really your dad" then the orphan asked some questions to the man and the man gets some of them right so the orphan believes that the man is his dad and then the orphan says "you really are my dad?" and then he shows his dad his house and the orphan has a room mate and the dad and the orpahn finally get to then bedroom and then the dad knocks out the orphan and then the dad starts to have something with the orphan / son and the room mate hears weird noises in the orphans / sons room and he walks in and see them having seggs and the room mate records it but then kicks out the dad out f the house and then the room mate shares the video to the orphans school chat and then the next day the dad gets arrested because he was actually a gay nonce and everybody at the orphans school call him gay but he really isnt but since he was mad and disgusted he pulled a AK47 out of his bag and kills everybody in the school and was never seen again.

Btw this is a joke so dont take it seriously.

Which Book takes an extreme turn and has an incredible Plot Twist?

-The math Book📘🔢. Suddenly letters 🔠 appear in the calculations...

One day, a little girl was texting her friend. " Guess what Angelica!" said the little girl

"What?" Angelica replied

"I'm a guy."

When you realize you forgot to mop ur room you hear footsteps 🥋

Your hairline goes so far back my history teacher was surprised.

What is the only thing worse than being told you're adopted? Still being in the orphanage at 13.

So one day in 3rd grade, i was making this art piece and i was talking about my friend that was a boy that i have known for 5 years. but then, the other boy at my table named Coen Jones shouted, "NO! I"M THE ONLY BOYFRIEND YOU CAN HAVE!!!!" as soon as i heard all that, the teacher and the rest of our class was shocked while our table was just laughing there butts off, but laughed so hard, i fell out of my chair!