New Street Jokes - Page 11 - Worst Jokes Ever

Two Trojan warriors were patrolling the streets of Troy at night. It was finally time for their duties to be relived. When they went back to their houses, one Trojan fell in a puddle. Nitrogen! The other called. And the other responded coldly, “Good nigh-“

I asked a pretty, young homeless woman if I could take her home. She smiled at me and said yes.

The look on her face soon changed, however, when I walked off with her cardboard box.

So I am an emo dude so I sit in the back of the class and I talk to no one.But one day this dude came up to me and tried to talk to me so I just ignored him.Then he got really pissed off and said “I’m gonna kill you”.I was like “Your gonna kill me just because I ignored you, is your ego that big, wow.”He left then the next day he brought his goons with him and said “now your dead” I ignored him again and he said “you will pay for this.”So the following day after school I was walking down the street back to my house then him and his goons tried to attack me, but then they died so I kept on walking.I had some rope traps set.This was the best day of my life.

This is why you never mess with emo’s.We have ropes everywhere.

People say dogs are like their owners. So true. My dog keeps on running into the street as if she doesn't care about her life. I don't care about her life either hahahaha!!;)

So Timmy was walking down the street with his friend Lea. Suddenly a car drives by and Timmy waves at the car. Lea looks at his puzzled then later asks him; "Why'd you wave at that car back there?" Timmy replies "Oh that was my brother, he went to the bar. He must just be driving home..

my dad- you better ware flip-flopped everywhere suicidal son-goes to crack ally

A man was walking down the street with a swivel chair under one arm, a computer under the other and a desk strapped to his back. A policeman ran over to him and handcuffed him, saying "I'm arresting you for impersonating an office, sir"

I was walking down the street when i thought i smelled my ex's perfume, turns out i was standing in front of a fish market.

Why did Billy drop his ice cream? Cause he got hit by a bus

Here’s a trick I learned to do on the calculator

Sally had 69 boobs (69) which was too too too many (69222) so she went to the the doctor on 51st street (6922251) and he said to take a certain pill 8 times a day (6922251 times 8), which left her (flip your calculator over)

Boobless

What was the movie about the dog called?

The woof of wall street

A guy is bankrupt so he gives his son a duck and tells him to go sell it for as much as he can.so the kid goes on the street to sell the duck. A prostitute walks by and says I'll f--ck you for $10. The boy says I would but I don't have any money. She says ok I'll take the duck instead. He says ok so they go up stairs and f—ck. The prostitute says that's the best sex I've ever had. I'll give you the duck back and we can do it again. So they do and he gets the duck back. But when they go downstairs the duck gets hit by a car. And the guy that hit the duck feels so bad that he gives the kid $25. So when he gets home his father asks him why he looks so tired. The boy says well I got a f—ck for a duck, a duck for a f—ck, and $25 for a f—cked up fuck.

i got hit by a bus but the bus was my ex

I asked my uncle why he was living on the streets. He said that he wasn't always on the streets, he used to have a job at these two towers. I asked him what happened, and he said two planes happened.