What happened when the emo went through the self-checkout?
Two beeps went off.
How to become a monkey?
Put a red dot on your forehead.
For all those Simpsons fans out there, this one I'm sure you know:
Abe: "It's rotten being old. No one listens to you."
Lisa: "It's awful being a kid. No one listens to you."
Homer: "I'm a white male, aged 18-49. Everyone listens to me--no matter how dumb my suggestions are."
What do you call a triggered white kid?
A school shooter!
Yo mama so fat that when she went out in high heels, she came back in flip flops.
"G.I. Jane 2, can't wait to see it!"
Taking an emo kid grocery shopping does have its perks.
You get to scan their wrists for discounts!