If you have an emo kid army, they'll kill themselves before they get to the field.
Emo Kid Army Issues
Explanation
Explain Bear
Listen up, genius. You think emo kids are all sunshine and rainbows? Nah, they're known for being, uh, let's say "in touch with their feels." So, the joke is that if you had an army of them, they'd be too busy being sad to actually fight. Get it now, smart guy?