Meat

Anonymous

What did Pluto say to Saturn while barbecuing steaks? Mine is meat-eor than yours

Possible

Anonymous

The waiter asked me how would you like your steak? I replied “as soon possible” !!!

German

Anonymous

What is the one sauce Germans avoid on their steak?

Ajous

Man

Corrienne Strong

A man who desperately wanted to be good after serving time in prison was visited by an Angel "You want to change? You can still enter heaven on two conditions …you must bet on the horses with any money you have and pass your winnings to someone less fortunate and you must never hold on to any beef . " The Angel then disappeared.  The man did as was told and became generous and kind …as he emerged from the betting office with all his money… he would pass every penny of it all to a deserving person…each and everytime. He ,however couldn’t seem to avoid meat and would still eat it no matter what .  When he died the Angel came back for him … “But I’m undeserving I can’t come with you” he said … “Yes you can” replied the Angel , “you gave all your stake ( steak) away”

Cow

The cow

What do you call a cow with all of his legs -high steaks

Cow

Anonymous

I am mis-steak.

Cow

Anonymous

What do you call a cow that was hit by an anvil? A flat iron steak.

Cow

Abhor

A couple of cows were smoking a joint and playing cards… The steaks were pretty high

Steak

Anonymous

What do you do when you made a misteak? You do some yoga 🧘‍♀️ and say namaaa steak.

Miss

Person

Becoming a vegetarian is a huge missed steak.

Puns

2sad4u

My kitchen was rearranged today. The tables have turned and the steaks are higher.

Man

Anonymous

Gambler

A guy walks into a butcher’s shop and says "Sir, are you a gambling man?" The butcher says, “Why yes, as a matter of fact I am.” "Then I’ll bet you $25 you can’t reach up and touch that meat hanging over your head right there." The butcher thinks for a moment and says, "I’m sorry, I won’t take that bet." The guy says, “But I thought you said you were a gambling man.” “I am. But the steaks are too high.”

Steak

Anonymous

hey whats up

Puns

Anonymous

How do you eat a meat?

  • you steak it in your mouth

Cow

Kill me

What do you call an idiotic cow

A mis-steak!

Puns

Your missing dog

A man walks into a bar and sees a piece of steak on the ceiling. The cashier says “If you can grab it, your meal’s free.”. The man then said “Nah, the stakes are too high.”.

Steak

messed up

i like my women like i like my steak… bloody

Cow

Anonymous

My sister has cows and after 4 months she said the was a miss steak.

Wind

Nathan

How does a butcher keep his tent up in the wind? Steaks.

Cow

Anonymous

What do you call a cow grazing a field with 50% grass and 50% weed?

High steaks gambling.

Puns

Laaaaalaaaaamaaaaaaablub

Someone asked me, how would you like your steak cooked? I said, on a stove!!!

Man

sans

a man walks into a bar, and notices a steak hanging from the ceiling. when he asks the bartender about it, the bartender says “If you can jump up and hit it, drinks are on the house for the night, but if you miss, everyone’s drinks are on your tab for the next two hours. Do you want to try?” the man decided not to take the risk. he thought the steaks where too high.

Cow

Anonymous

My cow just wandered into a field of marijuana. The steaks have never been so high…

Puns

Anonymous

What do you call a steak that tastes bad? A MISsteak

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