Sports jokes
Why does Mexico never hold the Olympics? Because everyone that can run, jump, and swim is already out of the country.
Why are there a lot of whites in hockey?
It’s the only other job that involves beating something black other than being a cop.
I was in the corner shop and the Indian woman was sporting a red dot on her forehead. I scratched it off and won a fucking Ford Focus!
Q: What’s the difference between Usain Bolt and Adolf Hitler?
A: One got to finish a race.
Why are orphans so good at tennis?
Because that’s the only love they get.
Why are there no Olympics in Mexico?
Because everyone from Mexico that can run, jump, and swim is already over the border.
What is a Mexican's favorite sport?
Cross-country!!!
Why was Cinderella banned from playing sports? Because she always ran away from the ball.
After 40 years, Kobe finally learned to pass.
What did the football coach say when he went to the bank?
-"I want my quarterback."
Today someone was killed with a starter pistol. Police think it might be race related.
Why do basketball players like cookies? Because they can dunk them!
Pedophiles don't win races because they like to come in a little behind.
A lion, Johnny Depp, and a hockey player from Nashville all have one thing in common.
They're all Predators!
Once I went to watch a match in Portugal. It was between Penaldo and his kids. The referee was Georgiana (his wife). Mpaypal and Igayspeed were also there. The match began, and his kids scored two goals in the first 10 minutes. Then, when the match was about to end, Penaldo got angry and asked his wife for penalties. His wife declined, and he tortured and beat her up and took 10 penalties (missed 7 of them) but won 3-2. Shame on you, Penaldo! 😡😡😡
What do you call two Mexicans playing basketball?
Juan on juan.
What do you call a kid with Down syndrome who plays basketball?
Dribble.
Why does Mexico not have an Olympic team? Because everyone who can run, jump, and swim is already in America.
The orphan was playing baseball. He hit a home run. His coach told him to run home. He couldn't find it.
Q: Why was the leper hockey game cancelled?
A: There was a face off in the corner.