Why are orphans so good at tennis?
Because that’s the only love they get.
Sports Jokes
Why does Mexico never hold the Olympics? Because everyone that can run, jump, and swim is already out of the country.
How do you make a fruit punch?
You give it a pair of boxing gloves.
Why was Cinderella banned from playing sports? Because she always ran away from the ball.
Why are there a lot of whites in hockey?
It’s the only other job that involves beating something black other than being a cop.
Why do basketball players like cookies? Because they can dunk them!
Why can't Asians play baseball? Because they will eat the bat.
After 40 years, Kobe finally learned to pass.
What did the football coach say when he went to the bank?
-"I want my quarterback."
Pedophiles don't win races because they like to come in a little behind.
Today someone was killed with a starter pistol. Police think it might be race related.
A lion, Johnny Depp, and a hockey player from Nashville all have one thing in common.
They're all Predators!
Q: What’s the difference between Usain Bolt and Adolf Hitler?
A: One got to finish a race.
Why are there no Olympics in Mexico?
Because everyone from Mexico that can run, jump, and swim is already over the border.
What do you call two Mexicans playing basketball?
Juan on juan.
Why does Mexico not have an Olympic team? Because everyone who can run, jump, and swim is already in America.
A blonde woman was speeding down the road in her little red sports car and was pulled over by a woman police officer, who was also a blonde.
The blonde cop asked to see the blonde driver's license. She dug through her purse and was getting progressively more agitated.
'What does it look like?' she finally asked. The policewoman replied, 'It's square and it has you picture on it.'
The driver finally found a square mirror in her purse, looked at it and handed it to the policewoman. 'Here it is,' she said.
The blonde officer looked at the mirror, then handed it back saying, "OK, you can go. I didn't realize you were a cop..."
What does your first football game and your first time having sex have in common?
You were bloody and battered but at least your dad came.
Q: Why was the leper hockey game cancelled?
A: There was a face off in the corner.
Once I went to watch a match in Portugal. It was between Penaldo and his kids. The referee was Georgiana (his wife). Mpaypal and Igayspeed were also there. The match began, and his kids scored two goals in the first 10 minutes. Then, when the match was about to end, Penaldo got angry and asked his wife for penalties. His wife declined, and he tortured and beat her up and took 10 penalties (missed 7 of them) but won 3-2. Shame on you, Penaldo! 😡😡😡
