Sports jokes
I was exploring a haunted mansion when I encountered a ghost named Pristiano Penaldo. He asked if I supported Burnley as he wanted to statpad against me. Luckily, I pulled out my trusty Liverpool shirt, and he disappeared. Shame on you, Penaldo.
I went to a park, then I kicked a ball at a kid in a wheelchair, then screamed "Rocket League!"
Why is the thief so good at basketball? Because he can shoot, steal, and run.
What's a Mexican's favorite sport?
Cross country.
Why can't orphans play baseball?
They can't find home.
get this one guys
Why did the police go to a baseball game?
Because a player stole the base.
How do you know when a football player has been to jail?
When he goes in a tight end and comes out a wide receiver.
Why doesn't China have a cricket team?
They always eat the bat.
Yo mama so dumb, she thought a quarterback was a refund.
It’s the World Cup Final, and a man makes his way to his seat right next to the pitch. He sits down, noticing that the seat next to him is empty. He leans over and asks his neighbor if someone will be sitting there. “No,” says the neighbor. “The seat is empty.” “This is incredible,” said the man. “Who in their right mind would have a seat like this for the Final and not use it?” The neighbor says, “Well, actually the seat belongs to me. I was supposed to come with my wife, but she passed away. This is the first World Cup Final we haven’t been to together since we got married.” “Oh, I’m so sorry to hear that. That’s terrible... But couldn’t you find someone else, a friend, relative or even a neighbor to take her seat?” The man shakes his head. “No,” he says. “They’re all at the funeral.”
I was playing a tennis match against a girl and said, "I will fuck you up." She said, "Try me." So that's exactly what I did, and I won by forfeit as she ended up running away crying.
I was wondering why the basketball was getting bigger. Then it hit me.
Yo mama is so dumb, she thought Dunkin' Donuts was a basketball team.
Why can't the orphan play baseball?
Because it doesn't know where home is... *sniff*
What's the twin towers' favorite football team?
New York Jets.
What's 9/11 survivors' least favorite NFL team?
New York Jets.
Why didn't the koala make the finals? It got diskoalafied.
Why doesn’t Pakistan have any football teams?
Every corner they get, they open a shop on it!
Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants? - In case he got a hole in one.
Why shouldn’t you play basketball with a pig?
Because he’s a ball hog.