Sports jokes
Why can't orphans play baseball?
They don't know where home plate is.
What is Mexico's favorite sport? Cross country.
What's 9/11 survivors' least favorite NFL team?
New York Jets.
What did the helicopter say to the mountain?
Kobe!!!
Just send me to hell already.
Few jokes (sorry if they have already been used).
1 I couldn't figure out why the baseball kept getting bigger. Then it hit me.
2 Why does Humpty Dumpty love autumn? Because he always has a great fall.
3 Have you heard the one about the skunk? Never mind, it really stinks.
4 It's always windy in a sports arena. All those fans.
5 What is the best day to go to the beach? Sunday, of course!
6 Comic Sans walks into a bar. The bartender says, "We don't serve your type here."
7 What's the easiest way to get straight As? Use a ruler.
8 Why were they called the Dark Ages? Because there were lots of knights.
Coach: Why can't orphans play baseball?
Me: Because they can't get a homerun.
Why can't orphans play baseball?
Because they don't know how to hit a home run.
Why does the pancake team in baseball always win? Because they have the best batter.
Why can't orphans play baseball?
Because they can't find home.
Why can't orphans play baseball?
'Cause they don't know where home is.
My friend that used to be married was making jokes about me being short. Then I told him, "Your marriage was so short it made me look like Shaquille O'Neal."
Your forehead is so big, it looks like I did a drag back on FIFA.
I wanted to play as Kobe Bryant on my gaming console, but the game kept crashing.
I was at a supermarket in Barcelona and I noticed the alarm had gone off. There was a thief at the store; the tea bag section had been ransacked.
Luckily they found the thief, Pionel Pessi, with boxes of his favourite tea, Penaltea. Shame on you, Pessi!
What do you call a bunch of white people on a bench?
The NBA.
Girl: Boys are like sports, they get played.
Boy: Girls are like rocks, the flat ones get skipped.
Which is the best sport at making fat people lose weight?
Canned hunting.
I was in Portugal enjoying my lunch when I saw a man choking! I wanted to save him, but a local stopped me. “That’s Penandes, he always chokes when it matters most and ghosts in big games.” True enough, Penandes’ Ghost emerged from his body! Poor Penandes, may he get well soon!
MISSING!!
MISSING!!
Name: Ghostiano Penaldo
Missing: 27/6/2021 vs Belgium
Characteristics: Disappearing in big games + Diving + always ranting "give me penalty".
Last found - Practicing tap ins.
Possible Locations: Penalty Spot, Parma, Crotone.
Might be dangerous towards good players.
What is Jesus' favorite sport? CrossFit.