Sports jokes
I love to play catch with my dad! He's never there to catch the ball, though.
Why was the computer so good at golf? Because he had a hard drive.
What's a Mexican's favorite sport? Cross country.
What do an acting role and playing sports have in common?
If you break a leg, you get cast.
Why can't an orphan play baseball?
He doesn't know where home is.
My first high-school football game was a lot like my first time having sex...
I was bloody and sore at the end, but at least my dad came.
Why did Little Sally get hurt while playing soccer?
Because she fell into a minefield.
What's Africa's greatest sporting achievement? The 2018 World Cup...
A ball hit me in the vagina.
What's a Latino's favorite sport? Lacrosse.
Pedophiles don't win races because they like to come in a little behind.
What is Osama bin Laden's favorite football team?
The New York Jets.
P = Person (not original "pun")
P1: Hey girl! P2: I got a bf! P1: Well, I got a Lamborghini Aventador, a Bugatti Super Sports, a yacht, and a private plane. P2: BF stand for breakfast. P2: Oh, and also, where did you get all that stuff? P1: GTA5 P2: You motherfucker!!!
(Communications with this person are now blocked)
Arsenal
What's Al Qaeda's favorite football team?
New York Jets.
A man is meeting a client in Japan, but arrives a day early. When night hit, he went out with a prostitute. They're having sex, but the prostitute kept shouting "Fuji, Fuji, Fuji!", so the man thinks he's doing a good job. The next day, the man meets his client and they go golfing, and the client gets a hole in one. The man praises him by going "Fuji, Fuji, Fuji!". His client turns around confused and says, "What do you mean wrong hole!?"
What's a lesbian's favorite sport? Dodgeball.
What do you call a white man surrounded by black men? Coach.
Why can’t orphans play baseball?
Because they can’t find home.
Why didn't the skeleton play football?
His heart wasn't in it!