son:Hey Dad why is my name Dick? Dad: Ohh because a dick fell on you when you were born. son: Ohhhhh so thats why im gay.
Roses are red, violets are black, I traded my son for 10 big macs
Son - Dad, I've been expelled from school for having sex with a girl in my class.
Dad - Son, that's the 2nd school this year! Maybe teaching isn't for you!
Dad: Hey have you seen that new movie constipation? Son: No Dad: It hasn't come out yet
An obese, depressed mother is trying to tie a noose, but can't reach it, so she calls her son for help.
*A few minutes later*
son: There.
mother: Where did you learn to tie such a good noose?
son: Dad showed me before he died.
mother: DAMN HIM TO HE- *slips and the noose chokes her to death*
Jesus Christ does exist, he does, and he is the son of god ....... a god that doesnt exist XD
When you say to your dad ............................... AGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!! DAD BE LIKE ....... WHO WANTS MY SON NAN BE LIKE ME KID BE LIKE ........AGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH GIVE ME #### ROUX WHAT ARE ROUX SAYS NAN UM THERE YOUR LIFE SAVINGS NAN BE LIKE LETS GET SOME ROUX
I still remember my dad's last words: "Don't worry son, Allah will be pleased."
Son: Daddy,Why this red soup is so much sweet? Because your mother had diabetes
The son margarine shows his father his test that he failed. Father: son you can do butter
Dark Humor: Mom: See that guy over there with no hands, tell him to clap Son: Mom, I'm blind Mom: Exactly Inspired by my derp other half
A kid came from school. His mother said "What did you do in school?" The boy replied "I had sex with my my Teacher" She said "OH MY GOD, GO TO YOUR ROOM, WAIT UNTIL YOUR DAD COMES!" He waited, then his dad walked in and said "Your mother told me what you did. I'm proud of you son. Let's go buy you a bicycle." When they arrived to the store The dad said " Try out and see which seat is the comfortable." The boy said "I can't, my butt is sore" Dad said "Why is your butt sore" The Boy said "Because I had sex with my teacher".
When a family friend passed away, my granddaughter took her three-year-old son to visit the widow. As they approached the front door, she whispered to the boy, “Make sure to tell her how sorry you are.”
He whispered back, “Why? I didn’t kill him.”
My father said I'm to reliant on technology. I called him a hypocrite, and unplugged his life support
Son: Dad do you remember your first blowjob? Dad: Ohhh yeah I do! Son: How did it taste? Dad: Get out.
My son asked me to stop singing Oasis songs in public I said maybe
my blind son got hit by a car when he was riding his new bike he should have been paying attention
Kid -dad I want santa to give me iphone Indian poor dad- son santa is deaf Kid-no he is not I saw him on Tv yesterday Indian poor dad-oh actually I asked him to for a new wife may be he is wearing AirPods Kid-you are my santa daddy Indian poor dad- pull down you pants son Kid-it's not apple product Indian poor dad -its banana
one day there were these 3 cow boys sitting next to a fire and they were telling each other about their adventures well the first cow boy said i tangled with a bull that killed 6 people so i wrestled that son of a bitch to the ground with my bare hands the second cow boy said that's nothing yesterday i was walking on a trale and came across a rattler so i picked it up ,bit its head off and drank all his venom in one gulp the third cow boy remained quiet stering the embers of the fire with his penis
One day a snail got robbed by two turtles. The cops arrived and arrested the woman for killing her cheating husband, and the son was sent to child services. (Moral - no one cares about the frkn snail and turtles)
