Society jokes
Two men walk into a bar, the third one ducks.
Why can’t an orphan play baseball?
They don’t know where home is.
In 2006 on 6/9, there was something called communication opportunity happened. On 6/9. 69. Coincidence? I think NOT.
And there's the referee taking down Ronaldo's number.
Not really the time or the place, but it's good to see that we've kept homophobia out of football.
I don't really trust the press. Sometimes they wear badges that say "press," but if you press those badges, they just fall over, all surprised.
One day, I was walking down the street, and then I saw something really funny, and then I ran, and I saw a boomer, but I don't really know what I'm talking about, lol.
Eat frozen orphans, it's ğøöđ.
Why can orphans go to Thacker Jewelry?
They love to see the whole family.
Why do orphans like going to church?
Because they actually get to say "father" for once.
If you take your dog for a walk and you BOTH use the fire hydrant down at the corner...you might be a Redneck!
KK or Liv?
Why can't orphans play baseball?
They don't know where home is.
What do a 14-year-old pregnant girl and the child inside her have in common?
Both are thinking, “Oh no! My mom’s gonna kill me!”
Why don't Indians play baseball?
Every time they reach a corner, they make a shop.
What was the scariest thing Helen Keller ever read?
The waffle iron.
As a son, I am so worried about the phone call message that my mom got from a member of The CDC. It was on speaker, so me and mom both hear. The message told my mom that she needs to personally isolate because two of the new symptoms is having big titties and a great personality.
Yesterday, I tried to help a little girl by a road stop crying. I asked her where her parents were, and that made her cry harder. So then I asked her where her house was, and she said with tears, "I don't have one." So I got her in my car and drove her to where she said she was living. It was an orphanage.
Q: What's a pedophile's favorite type of candy?
A: Loli-pops.
What’s the hardest part about f...ing toddlers?
My boner.
Me: *gives her 5 dollars* Climb that flag pole. Cute female: *takes the money and goes up the flag pole* Is this good? Me: Hell yeah, that's a nice view.
*Next day* Here's 10 dollars if you do it again. *She goes up there* Me: How's the view? *She goes home and her mom sees the money* Her mom: Where you getting this money? Her daughter: I climbed a flagpole. Her mom: You know he just wants you to see your panties, right? *She goes back and does it again but doesn't wear panties* Me: Holy shit ;-; Her mom: Did you do it again? Her daughter: Don't worry, Mom, he didn't get to see my panties. Her mom:...