Society jokes
Women have less rights than a NASCAR track.
What does a priest and time have in common? They're both predators.
If you play Minecraft too much, you belong to the streets.
Girl: You are gay.
Boy: Who says I’m gay?
Girl: You ARE GAY!
Boy: You are lesbian.
Crowd: OhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhbhbhhhbhH
Once there was a midget man jumping on a pothole saying 43, 43, 43. A kid walks up to the man and says, "Why are you saying 43, 43, 43?"
The man stops and looks at him, then he starts jumping again and says 43, 43, 43.
The kid asked him again and so on.
Then the man stops, opens the pothole, throws the kid in, closes it, and starts jumping and says 44, 44, 44!!!"
What are intelligent people in the US called?
"Tourist."
Hey, the biggest distraction will never be my tattoos in this facility if you understand what I am saying.
But in all seriousness, welcome to the biggest frat party taking place near the ocean. I am most likely going to tell my family this or maybe not, depending what's going down. I am very adaptive through different circumstances.
So, if being a paedophile is a career, then burying the bodies must be gardening.
Q: How to hit an orphan?
A: Hit them with a family tree.
Orphans can’t work at Johnson and Johnson because it’s a family company.
What's the difference between you and the internet? People want a connection from the internet.
Why do orphans always go to church? Because that’s the only place they could call someone "father."
What do you call a child predator and an illegal immigrant? Alien vs. Predator.
What do you call a white girl that can run faster than her brothers? A redneck virgin.
Roses are red, That's a tin can, You have no home, So get in the van!
Who are the fastest readers in the world? New Yorkers. They went through 110 stories in under 10 seconds.
How many police officers does it take to screw in a light bulb?
None, they just beat the room for it being black.
What's the name of a cannibal's favorite all-you-can-eat buffet? Planned Parenthood!
Why can't orphans play baseball?
Because they can't find home.
Mom: They say our kid neighbor has blue blood.
Son: Really?
Also 2 hours later:
Son: Mom, the kid doesn't have blue blood.
Mom: Son, I-