Society jokes
First date be like:
Me: "I work with animals every day."
Her: "Oh, how sweet! What is it exactly that you do with them?"
Me: "I'm a butcher."
Me at an orphanage: I need to talk.
Orphan: My parents!
Me: You know that word?
Why do American guns only have 30 bullets?
'Cause that's how many kids are in a class.
I'm an orphan, so kidnap me.
What do Priests and School shooters have in common?
They both blast little kids in the face.
What is the difference between a condom and an orphan?
One of them is used.
If an emo kid jumps off a building, who would win?
Society.
Why do orphans like pedos? Because they have someone to call "daddy."
This is true. Today I was at the mall and there was a guy holding a sign that said, "Need money for strippers and weed."
I respect woman’s choices... either she wants to cook first, then clean, or she wants to clean first, then cook.
Why did the feminist get banned? For spreading conspiracy theories about the (non-existent) gender wage gap.
Why aren't women taken seriously in the world? They are too busy whining about getting raped.
Police: Come with me, I’m taking you home.
Orphan: Well, we need to find them first.
Police: Then I don’t need to take you home.
What is the only reason you can hit an orphan and get away with it?
What are they gonna do? Tell their parents?
What is the difference between an adopted kid and an orphan?
If you're adopted, you're actually wanted.
What's the difference between an apple and emos?
They both hang on trees.
I like my orphans how I like my wine, locked in my basement for ten.
What do a priest and a McDonalds have in common?
They both slide their meat in 10 year old buns.
Parents are like food—not all kids get them.
Man, I am jealous of the victims of 9/11. They are the fastest readers, who went through 87 stories in 8 seconds.