Social jokes
I'm pretty socially awkward when talking to girls, so I watched a video on how to keep conversations going.
The guy said to try and find things that remind you of something else and talk about that. For example, "that oak tree over there reminds me of the one we used to climb in my backyard as a kid. It used to be so much fun... and so on."
So next time I was having a conversation with a girl, I saw a red truck. So I said, "that red truck reminds me of the time my house burned down when I was 6." She said, "oh, and the fire trucks came to your house?" And I said, "no, I was getting molested in a red truck when my house burned down."
The emo kid wanted a high five. I left him hanging, so did the tree.
Our family is known for unusually sloppy diarrhea.
It runs in our jeans.
In prison, they called me sweet cheeks.
Why are birds good at social media?
Because they "tweet" all the time!?
If my firnd had a baby like this id call him ✨ "retard" ✨
Friend: How's it going?
Me: Good, things are good!
Parent: How are you?
Me: Oh, I'm fine!
Twitter: Compose new tweet?
Me: Hellooooo, I would like to tell you about my anxiety & my current greatest fears & let's talk about the impending apocalypse while we're at it.
Your hair is receding more than people do when they smell you.
Why didn't the chicken cross the road?
Social distancing.
Why did the skeleton not go to the ball? Because he had no body to go with.
My name is Mariah Carly Brown, and I am an orphan, and what do I say about your jokes that are not funny... STOP THEM!
Dark humor is mean! All day I go to see all the jokes I find, and I see "Orphan jokes."
What kind of sick person likes that kind of joke? By the way, it is not a question. I have 3 twin sisters! Lariah, Kariah, and Iariah! Iariah starts with an i! So stop the jokes, please!
Peter: Curses!
Jacob: Do you kiss your mother with that mouth?
Peter: *Crying*
Jacob: Why are you crying?
Jacob: Whatever. *Leaves orphanage*
What do you never say to gay people?
IF YOUR HAPPY AND YOU KNOW IT CLAP YOUR HANDS! 🤣🤣🤣🏳️🌈
Son to mother: "Mom, all the kids in the school are making fun of me because I am still a virgin."
Mother: "Well, start giving them bad grades, and they will stop."
What do Communism, Socialism, Feminism, and Fascism all have in common?
They are all disabilities.
Why can't orphans be gay?
They have nobody to call "Daddy~"
So um uh I like people who like people who like people.
*Knock Knock* Who's there? Social Services...
I bought this happy birthday card for this orphan.
To: The Orphan
From: ______
Me: Mom, the weight scale wants your weight, not your phone number!
I'm bored and I'm sure someone scrolling through here is too, so wanna chat? Pls.