Skin jokes

How do you make a pink Smurf?

You peel the skin off.

Satanism is such an ugly word. I prefer the term, "red skin appreciation."

Me: Now I know why Michael Jackson turned white.

The police: You finally figured it out.

Tibia honest, it takes a lot of spine to memorize all the bones in the skeletal system. I mean, there's a skele-ton of em! You gotta be boned up for the skeletal system exam, buddy chum pal. Now that was a humerus ribtickling skelepun. Besides, if ya don't know all of the bones in the skeletal system, get boned, fucking numbskull. Did those tickle your funny bone? Now I've been working down to the bone typing these puns, kid. Now if you hate all these, I won't be bothered, I got thick skin! But first, lemme take a skelfie in the skelevator playing my trom-bone. Now, I gotta go to Grillby's. They got a discount on spare-ribs. Bone-voyage, my homeslice breadslice dawg.

Michael Jackson goes to the doctor.

Michael Jackson: "Help, doctor, I've been shot!" Doctor: "I can't fix that, but I can change your skin color so it doesn't happen again."

Why do cats leave scratches on arms? They don't; I do it myself.

Roses are red, balls are round, skirts are up, panties are down, belly to belly, skin to skin, when it's stiff, stick it in.

What did the momma grape say to the pappa grape?

"Raisin' our kids is usually pretty fun, but sometimes they get sunburn and I have to take them to the doctor for dry skin."

Emos are dark people....

...So why are they all white?

Goths are even darker...

SO WHY ARE THEY WHITER!?

If olive oil is made of olives, then baby oil is made of...

What is black, white, and red all over?

A sunburnt zebra.

Son: Dad, I have black skin and you have white skin, are you sure you're my parents?

Dad: Oh... well I never thought it would come to this, or to your head that you were kidnapped...

Son: Am I kidnapped?

Dad: Well, you're adopted, and if you want to see your biological parents, they’ll be waiting for you in heaven.

Once my sister was a sister, now she's a blister.

What is Michael Jackson's favorite instrument? A small skin flute.

Trump is so orange that he makes the Oompa Loompas look white.

Josh: What’s the useless piece of skin around the vagina called?

Daniel: Isn’t it the women?

Josh: Oh yes, that’s right.

Do you have a sunburn, or are you just always this hot?

Why are you so white?

Because you have no lotion on.

How do you stop all homophobic heterosexual white men from using all public men's restrooms at a rest area?

Make sure that all public men's restrooms at the rest area are always occupied with gay men that have long and thick big cocks, regardless of skin color.

My arm has a different texture than the rest of me, lol.