Size jokes
"Mine is 3 inches."
"That's not very lo..."
"From the ground."
Your momma so fat, when she asked for a water bed, she got a concrete bed.
What did the kangaroo say to the elephant? Hi up there!
Yo mama is so fat, I thought she was a beach whale.
What is a big animal 🦓? A bat 🦇!
Q. What do Kenny's dick and this joke have in common?
A. They're both really short.
Why are cows 🐮 so big? To scare babies 👶.
Yo mama so hot, she can fit in a mug.
Fat moms.
You're so fat that you have to live on Pluto so you don't destroy any of the planets.
Your butt is bigger than Uranus!
I tried to make vegetable soup today, but the wheelchair didn't fit in the pot.
What do you call a midget that waves at you?
A microwave.
A short person should never piss off a fat person taller than them. The fat person just has to lean slightly, and it's 9/11 all over again.
Uranus is huge.
What do you call a midget that waves? A microwave.
Your momma is so fat, the whole Earth falls down to 100,000,000 ft.
Yo, forehead is so big...the photo on yo driver's license says "to be continued on the back."
The only problem being short and gay is that whenever I try to tell people I'm top in my relationship, they don't believe me because I'm shorter than the person I'm dating, like, WTF?
Three guys walk into a bar: one Asian, one American, one Black.
A girl walks in and says if all three of your D*** sizes don't add up to 12 inches, I will shoot you.
First comes the American with 3 inches, then the Black man with 8.
It totals out to 11 and they look at the Asian and say "Oh no."
He comes to 1 inch to top off the twelve.
She walks away and says ok.
The Asian says, "You're lucky she was hot, so I had a boner!"