Size jokes
How do you fit a whale inside a car? A blender.
What did the minute hand say to the hour hand?
Why are you so tall?
"Yo mama's so fat, that I took a picture of her last Christmas, and it's still printing today!"
Your mama so fat the flash died halfway running around her.
What's the smallest stick in the world?
Your man's dick.
Why shouldn’t you pick on a midget with learning difficulties?
... Because it’s not big and it’s not clever.
You're tiny!
Yo mama so fat, she sunk the Titanic.
Yo mama so fat, her swimming is Sea World.
What is the difference between a school bus and a baseball?
You can throw a baseball, and you can’t throw a school bus.
Yo mama so fat that when she attempted suicide, she bounced to Area 51.
How are shark eggs and your mom the same? They're both the biggest thing ever laid.
Your Momma's so fat, the recursive function calculating her mass causes a stack overflow.
Your forehead is so big that it made Mona Lisa smile.
Big penis.
Question: What's the smallest thing on earth?
Answer: Your brain.
Why can't orphans eat a large bag of chips? Because they're family size.
Borders are fat.
Your butt's so big you can slap it and ride the waves.
"Mine is 3 inches."
"That's not very lo..."
"From the ground."