Situation jokes
I asked to switch seats on a plane because I was next to a crying baby.
Evidently that doesn't work if the baby is yours.
What is the difference between E.T. and an orphan?
E.T. can actually call home.
How do you make an orphan's hands bleed?
You tell them to clap till their parents come home.
Why can't orphans have chips? Because it's family size.
Dad: I’m taking your toys to the orphanage.
Child: But why?
Dad: Because you’re going to need them there.
Yo mama's so stupid, when I said, "Drinks on the house," she got a ladder.
I’m in a wheelchair and I can do stand-up comedy, oh wait...
What do orphans and broken up couples have in common?
They can't see each other anymore.
Orphan, they're enough of a joke.
The easiest time to add insult to injury is when you're signing someone's cast.
This is fucked up, my name is Shaylie.
Why do orphans love Oreos?
Because when they have a family pack, they can eat it all!
What's one advantage of being an orphan?
Nobody can make mama jokes about you. 🌚
The pastor jumped at the chance to meet Ariana the other day.
He also grabbed, fondled, and fingered. Some might say he was milking the situation.
What do you call an orphan in a wheelchair running into fire?
Hot wheels.
Two blondes fell down a hole.
One said, "It's dark in here, isn't it?"
The other replied, "I don't know; I can't see."
Why do orphans hate school? Because of homework.
The George Floyd situation was breathtaking.
Walk into the club like, "Wow, I got a big penis!"
I was just sitting down when all of a sudden she screamed, "Help!"