Situation jokes
Why do orphans not like Family Guy? Because they have family.
What happens when there's ten people in one house and they all have to shit and there's one bathroom?
It's a motherfucking shitshow party!
When you ask an orphan to come over:
Kid: "Do you want to come over to my house?"
Orphan: "Yeah, sure."
Kid: "Ok, ask your parents—oh wait."
Why couldn't the orphan have the bag of chips?
It was family size.
Why is the orphan sad for dinner?
He has no one to eat with at the table.
It's ALWAYS like this
If someone says nobody asked, you could say, "Well, nobody asked for you to talk!"
Murueurx.
Dad: Boy, come sit in this hole while I brace the ground.
Boy: I don't want to see Grandpa, he scares me!
What is it called when an orphan takes a selfie?
A family photo.
Two men walk into a bar, the third one ducks.
Did you see the dyslexic kid try to write down “funeral?”
No? Shame, it was real fun.
Attended my boss's funeral to pay my respects. On my way out, I leaned over his casket and whispered lightly, "Well, look who's thinking outside the box now."
What is the easiest way to get into a busy hospital? Try to commit suicide.
(YES I KNOW I SPELLED SCUCIDE WRONG)
The COVID-19 situation has been especially stressful for the Flat Earth Society.
They fear that social distancing measures could push people over the edge.
If a mentally challenged person shows up late,
Is it ok to call him tardy?
Two guys walk into a bar. The third guy ducks.
Be smart, not stupid.
I hate it when people say to suck it up... I mean, sometimes I don’t want someone’s dick in my face.
How do you make an orphan's hands bleed?
You tell them to clap till their parents come home.
Why can't orphans have chips? Because it's family size.
Dad: I’m taking your toys to the orphanage.
Child: But why?
Dad: Because you’re going to need them there.