Me calling the orphan kid from school: "Hello, are your parents home?"
The orphan kid: *starts sobbing* "STOP CALLING HERE!"
Your mum is so fat, flat earthers think she's round!
What is depressing, alone, chronic, and messed up? Me.
I gave my friend some paper. It cut his wrists.
P.S. My brother made this up when he had no meds... I almost died.
What does ATM stand for?
Answer: Amyβs Terrible Mom.
ππ€£
What do you call a disabled person who deals drugs?
A wheel dealer.
I stole a wheelchair. I knew the owner would come crawling back.
"Suicide bomber kills 44 people in Pakistan mosque." Damn, that's a crazy K/D. He must be hacking.