Short jokes
Where do you order nonbinary pizza?
Little xe/xyrs.
What part is usually missing in an orphan’s computer system?
Motherboard.
Where does Hitler look first when he loses something? The attic.
What passengers were happy that the Titanic sank?
The lobsters in the kitchen.
Your hairline goes so far back that cars on a highway don't know which way to turn.
If two eagles make a baby and two sparrows make a baby, what makes no baby?
Two swallows.
People on the Titanic were cracking up at my jokes, so did the Titanic. No, really, the Titanic cracked in half!
Say what you want about Hitler, at least he got the trains to run on time.
I’d tell you a Chinese joke, but it’s wong.
We need to stop making jokes about orphans. They will tell their parents. Oh wait...
If you were a vegetable, you would be a cute-cumber.
What's the difference between a peanut and a priest?
With a peanut, you have to break the shell open for the nut to come out.
Fake emo: when I’m sad, I cut myself.
Real emo: same.
Fake emo: another piece of cake.
What's the difference between a golfer and a skydiver?
A golfer goes *whack* "darn" and a skydiver goes "darn" *whack.*
If per capita is an issue, decapita can be arranged.
A man walks into a bar and ends up with a concussion.
Maybe if he looked where he was going, he wouldn’t have hit that pole.
What do you call a white kid who kills another?
Russia vs Ukraine hahaha.
I tried to start a music career, but it crashed harder than Paul Walker.
What did the mother say to Michael J. on the beach?
"Excuse me sir, but you're in my son!"
Yo mama was so fat, Huggy Wuggy couldn't fit his arms around her!