Short jokes
What do you call a black person swimming?
Cursed Minecraft image.
What do you call it when an Arab girl has an abortion?
Removing a bomb.
What’s the rarest gun to find in Africa?
A water gun...
Yo momma so stupid... weather man says it's chilly outside... instead of a jacket, she gets a bowl and spoon!
Old mathematicians never die; they just lose some of their functions.
What did the cow say to the fat pig?
Moooooooove over!
Principal: You're being bad. I'm gonna need to call your parents!
Orphan: *sits there sadly*
Why aren't there any stray cats in Chinatown?
There are, but they're just listed as "pork" on the menus.
A boy got a soccer ball and a bike for Christmas. Why is he sad?
He doesn’t have legs.
They told me I'd never be good at poetry.
But to date I have made 3 jugs and a vase, and they look lovely!
What's the difference between the Titanic and Georgie from "It"?
Georgie floated!
What do you call cheese that's not yours?
Nacho cheese!
What do you call a baby potato?
Small fry!
What kinds of apples grow on trees?
All of them.
Why don’t they let Stephen Hawking have other electronics around him? Because he will sound staticky.
Why did the Royal Wedding get more publicity than the SantaFe school shooting?
'Cause Royal Weddings don't happen every week.
Stephen Hawking tried comedy.
His first line ruined it. "You know what I can't stand? Let me rephrase that, you know what? I can't stand."
Where do you find white people on a bench?
- The NBA.
When the school lets you near children again...
"I asked my friend what his height is?" He answered, "I'm sans'sational!"