Short jokes
If you're in Alabama, family reunions are basically speed dating events.
I went to go hang out with the emo kids, but they already did.
Why are there so many scars and cuts on your arm?
Because it's a battlefield.
Help, my ADHD is so bad that not even I can focus in a concentration camp.
I told a crippled guy he is immortal because he can't kick the bucket.
Hey, are you suicide? Because I want to do you!
Why is Joe Biden afraid of getting COVID?
Because he'd lose his sense of smell.
Why did the Xbox player cross the road? To render in the buildings.
What's the best way to catch a fish? Ask someone to throw it to you.
It's better being depressed and suicidal than being happy, know why? Happiness never lasts forever.
What does the suicidal person say on New Years?
"New year, no me."
I hate prom in Alabama. They always say, "Uhh, actually this is our family reunion." We are in Alabama, so they are the same thing.
What do White Castle sliders and Michael Jackson have in common? They have their meat in tiny wet buns.
My dad’s nickname for me is ‘Tiger’.
Now, my wrists look like a tiger.
Me: I found a group of furries in the woods.
Voice in back: Well, it looks like we're going huntin'.
Q: What do you call a black prostitute in space?
A: The Blackhole.
WOW this ultra realistic jenga is awesome!🔥🔥
Wanna play shark attack? I eat, you scream!
What is the difference between an illegal immigrant and E.T.?
E.T. eventually went home!
When someone says you're adopted, say, "But you're still at the orphanage."