Short jokes

Short jokes

Wrist

My dad’s nickname for me is ‘Tiger’.

Now, my wrists look like a tiger.

Furry

Me: I found a group of furries in the woods.

Voice in back: Well, it looks like we're going huntin'.

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  • Space

    Q: What do you call a black prostitute in space?

    A: The Blackhole.

    Shooting

    I was in a school shooting a few years ago, 3 people died.

    I guess that’s what you get when you’re bad at hide and seek.

    Cremation

    Why do old people swallow popcorn kernels?

    To make their cremation more entertaining when they die.

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  • Idiot

    My wife told me to stop being an idiot.

    I told her, "Which one do you want?"

    Baby

    What's the difference between a sheet and a baby?

    One of them is really loud when you iron it.

    Communist

    Minecraft

    Communists don't play Minecraft.

    They play Ourcraft.

    Flight

    Leave a man on a plane, and he flies for a day.

    Throw a man off a plane, and he flies for the rest of his life.

    Girlfriend

    Girlfriend

    My girlfriend died in Tokyo during a tsunami. I was sad, but my friend told me, "Don't worry, there are plenty more in the ocean."

    Emo

    Emo

    Why should you always give an emo a high five in the hallway? You can’t leave them hanging.

    Girlfriend

    German

    I hooked up with my German girlfriend. It was really distracting when she kept saying her age.

    9/11 victim

    Twin Towers

    Who are the fastest readers in the world?

    9/11 victims. They went through 67 stories in 0.67 milliseconds.