Short jokes
Did you hear about the blind prostitute?
Well, you gotta hand it to her.
A blonde, a redhead, and a brunette were all lost in the desert. They found a lamp and rubbed it. A genie popped out and granted them each one wish. The redhead wished to be back home. Poof! She was back home. The brunette wished to be at home with her family. Poof! She was back home with her family. The blonde said, "Awwww, I wish my friends were here."
I visited the 9/11 memorial, that was bomb just like the towers.
What’s the difference between jail and my basement?
Some people are let out of jail.
I'm gonna jump to my death.
Don't worry. I won't jump far.
Just off this chair here...
Why was the emo kid sad? Because his bar code expired.
I bought a book for my blind friend.
If Shaq had a boat, he would name it "Freethrow," because he would never sink it.
What's the twin towers' favorite football team?
New York Jets.
When the school shooter is right outside the classroom window, and the autistic kid starts trying to say hello to him.
Why did Billy fall off his bike?
Because his dad threw a chair at him.
Did you hear about the cannibal who passed his brother in the woods?
And that concludes your French oral. You can put your trousers back up, and I'll see you on Monday.
Technically, we have all been deeper in our mom than our dads have.
I have the best life coach ever, because he taught me to not care. He did it so well that he died last week, and I still don’t care.
What does an imouto ride?
Onii-san.
Why couldn't the astronaut put the helmet on his head?
Because he didn't have enough space.
Life would be so much easier if grass was emo.
Because it would cut itself.
I love Muslims, they are great at parties!
They have the best fireworks.
Why does Michael Jackson wear a white glove?
So he won't bite his fingers when he eats a tootsie roll.