Short jokes
What do you need an apple because you got an "izzy?"
What did the old chimney say to the young chimney?
"You're too young to smoke!"
That's not even a bad joke-
Let's stop this, it's not funny. Oh wait, the orphans are all gone with nobody. 😂
I'm on a seafood diet. I see food and eat it.
Have you seen my uncle?
Jesus: I have.
God: Me too.
What did the glove say to his girlfriend?
I glove you!
The highest praise my wife gave to me was when she told me, "The best feminine attribute on your body as a woman would be your p🍆nis." 🥰
No.
Yo momma so fat, she farts out volcanoes.
1+1=3, just add 9 months.
Period: Guess who’s back... back again...
Me: Ugh, can we not do this today?
Period: I can come back in 9 months?
Me: Keep fucking singing.
Q: Why doesn’t Jimmy Swaggart worry about his premature ejaculation problem?
A: He believes in the second cumming.
Bob, why are you kicking the kids?
What, it's not like they have a home to go to.
Every time my grandmother and I were at a wedding, she’d say: “you’re next.” So I started saying the same thing to her at funerals.
Sonic Boom in my ass.
Eastern Europe and Western Europe is a joke.
Why can't orphans call their friends?
Because they don't have a home phone!
Why did Stephen Hawking die?
Kobi shops at Aldi.
Here's a tip for cow tipping from TheRussianBadger.
"So if you see Otis from Barnyard, make sure you blast his ass from a distance!"