Short jokes
What do you call a cow you can’t see?
Camooflauged.
What do you call a mug? A mug dummy.
What do you get when skeletons are dancing in a tin can?
Noise!
An apple walked into the clinic.
The doctor asked what his favorite color was.
The apple said "red." :)
Bird on the beach: seagull.
Bird by the bay: bagel.
Bird down south Philly Walmart parking lot: illegal.
What did one canyon say to the other?
You stay here, I'm gonna rise up on ahead.
What do you do when an orphan gets you mad?
A stab to the neck and a bullet to the face.
Why did the orphan not play baseball? Because he couldn't find home.
Why did Pikachu chase Ash?
Because he wanted to Ketchum.
When you start sweating after filling in "C" for the third time in a row.
What is your favorite time of day?
What is your favorite name?
Q: What kind of building weighs the least?
A: A lighthouse!
Knock knock.
Who is there?
Mother.
Mother who?
Fuck off bichon, I'm your mother!
What can you build with people? A boat!
Microwave.
I hate straight people.
What time is your name from? Any time.
What name do you get if you mix the names Chris and Marisa?
Then you get the name Chrisa.
Over summer, I shot up my school and left a note saying, "I could have done this anytime!"