Short jokes
How do you catch a unique rabbit?
You-neak up on it.
People with wheelchairs listen to "Rolling in the Deep" by Adele.
Hey, stinks, you know why? 'Cause your butts dry!
@shelby denver is a massive nonce.
I heard they're making a film about Jimmy Savile, it's a very touchy subject.
I heard the film about is so boring it puts you to sleep.
Raffie?
This is Sally.
Sally says hi.
This is Sally when a car comes by. 🤕
I’m here to collect my bounty, what’s your bounty? Your pants.
What language do people at the center of the Earth speak?
Core-an (Korean)
Q: What do you call an elephant that isn't important?
A: My sister.
Mozart doesn't care if Bach is better than him; at least he puts a lot of emotion [into his music and] he makes people happy.
How do you get Dick from Richard?
You ask nicely.
My name is Bob, and I am a cow.
My grandfather was a knight, and his name was Sir Loin.
Free blacks in the Civil War is the same as me drawing a reverse card in Uno.
What's a gay guy should be scared of?
A straight gay!
Stephen Hawking didn't die, he got sucked up by the black hole then got sent to the large charger in the sky.
How old is a blue plane?
Blue.
Your mom shat you out after having Taco Bell. That’s why she calls you a little shat.
What did Santa use as a candy cane?
Wait, wait, I said it wrong.
Okay.
What did Santa use to do his garden...never mind.
What do you call a gay grenade?
A fragette.