Short jokes
Friend: Ooo, I see Jessica.
Me: Nice.
Friend: She got some red on her shirt.
Me: Yeah, that's where the Titanic hit her :///
When the driver ran out of fuel, what kind of gasoline did he use? Grassoline.
What's the difference between a rock and a woman?
The flat ones get skipped.
Stop posting things on orphan jokes, then!
What did the swearing hen say?
"Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, FUCK!" (It's cluck.)
What did the cussing rooster say?
"Cock-a-doodle-doo, phew!"
Hello, welcome to Joe’s Pizzeria and Abortion Clinic, where yesterday’s loss is today’s sauce! How may I help you today?
Comment if u liked the picture of Gwen in her "Bra."
What does a kid say to an orphan, "Where are your parents?"\n\n"I don’t have parents. Where are yours? Are you an orphan like me? I hope not!"
Las Vegas has a new 550-foot-tall Ferris wheel, hoping to gain tourists.
What’s already gaining “tourists”? Whores.
Stick your head up someone's butt. What do you get? A Butthead!
"Get your butt out of my face!"
"Then get your face out of my butt!!!"
Hey guys, I use toilet paper.
Stroke victims are my heroes.
My favorite is Louis C.K.
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Cock cock, who's there? Nobody.
My friend walked down the street and peed on a car.
Why didn't Stephen Hawking ever eat chicken wings? Because he didn't exist.
How did Peter Cottontail get his swing on? He made love to Alice in Wonderland.
Can a cook and clean for real? No, I do not want no rabbit hare in my house.
Yo mama so skinny, she choked on a SINGLE STRAND OF SPAGHETTI!
Doctor: Tomorrow is like John Cena, you won’t see it.