Short jokes
How do rappers stay cool?
They have MAD ICE!
Why did the rapper visit the bank?
To get his RHYME CHECK.
If you've spent less time inside your mother than your father has, you just might be from Alabama!
How does a rapper fix stuff?
With a RAP-AIR!
How many apples can you grow on a tree? All of them.
How can you tell if a pig is hot? It's bacon.
How do mice floss their teeth? With string cheese.
How do you cook an alligator? With a croc-pot.
What did the earthquake say when it was done? Sorry, my fault!
Why did the computer go to bed?
It needed to crash.
What kind of bug can tell time? A clock-roach.
What do you call a can opener that doesn't work? A can't opener.
"Yo mama's so fat that when she farts, Al Gore accuses her of global warming."
Inflation is so bad, McDonald’s is selling the 1/4 ouncer.
"What did the zero say to the eight?"
"That belt looks good on you!"
Where do fruits go on vacation?
"Pear-is!"
97 percent of women...
Friend 1: *turns off lights*
Friend 2: *is there with us*
Me: Woah! Where did friend 2 go?!
Your mom is so ugly that she made a mirror shatter.
What were Stephen Hawking's last words?
......