Short jokes

Short jokes

Dick

What do a Rubik's cube and a dick have in common? The more you play with them, the harder they get.

Friend

I used to have an imaginary friend who I could talk to, and he could grant me wishes and stuff... and then I stopped going to church.

Spam

What's the difference between a hippie chick and a can of Spam?

After 6 months in the woods, you'll still eat the can of Spam.

Deer

What do you call a deer with no eyes, no legs, and no balls?

Still no fucking idea.

School

You know shit is going down when anything pumped up kicks related is brought into school.

Meat

What is one thing humans do before they eat?

They beat their meat to make nuggets.

Bar

I don’t drink, don’t swear, don’t smoke, shit, I left my cigarettes at the fucking bar! (Andrew Dice Clay.)

Underwear

What do your underwear and the Starship Enterprise have in common?

They are both concerned about “Klingons near your anus”.