Short jokes

Short jokes

Cock sucker

I called my guy friend a cock-sucker the other day. He replied with, "Hey, 20 bucks is 20 bucks."

Food

What is the difference between me and food?

Food has a use.

Genealogist

Q: What's the difference between a Genealogist and a Gynecologist?

A: One looks up the family tree and the other looks up the family bush.

Hairline

Bro, your hairline and an athletics track have one thing in common: they look like Humpty Dumpty.

Money

If y'all gotta crush on me, tell me now before my dad spends my Valentine's money on crack and alcohol.

Test

Even though I look completely white, I am apparently 70% black!

Until I realized that it was a mouth swab test.

Parachute

Why did the skydiver bring a backup parachute?

In case the first one wanted to "cut ties" with them mid-air.

Chef

Why did the short person become a chef?

Because they could "microwave" dinner without needing a stool!

Hairline

When you got on an airplane, the flight attendant asked which hairline you were flying with.

Class

Alright, class, we have 39 students and 40 seats.

That one dyslexic kid thinking he’s Superman: