Short jokes
Two needles go to the river. One of them says, "I'm sorry!"
"I think my baby is so similar to me!"
"True, but the most important thing is that he is healthy!"
What do you call a woman who sleeps with multiple men?
A whore.
Two blonde girls find a beautiful Christmas tree in the woods.
After two hours, someone said, "We found a tree without bark!"
My husband wants to tell me about my childhood.
Ok, I can't access the panel without the password.
What is Uludağ made from? Dog pee!
I am so cool that even the fridge or a snowman would shiver his timbers when they see me :).
What do women and appliances have in common?
If they don't work, hit them until they work.
What does Army stand for?
Ain't Ready to be a Marine Yet.
What does Marine stand for?
My Ass Rides In Navy Equipment.
Which hole talks faster? Your mouth or your ass? Can't tell the difference because they both run shit at once.
What do feminists do when they fail at something?
Blame men for sexism and misogyny.
Are you gay? "No." Oh, so you're not happy? "No." Oh...
How can you tell what kind of emo you are?
By how deep the cuts are on your forearm.
Dynamic song tutorial: Momo dela dela bro, dela dela bro, cuemcuemcuemcuem.
How many Joe Biden jokes are there?
None, because they're all true.
How are Jews and potatoes different?
A potato keeps its skin.
Why do Jews suck at mugging?
Because all they ask for is the spare change in your pockets.
You're more depressing than your own abortion video.
I don't joke about paraplegics; they wouldn't be able to stand up for themselves.