Short jokes
Imagine everyone being hoes.
What’s the difference between 69 and High School?
In 69 you usually only kiss one c*nt and look at one a**hole.
Why did the dog cross the road twice?
Because he was trying to catch a boomerang.
What did Yoda say when he saw himself in 4K? "HDMI."
Hey Gwen! What is a bean's specialty? Being a jerk!
Why do orphans pick apples? Because that's the only thing they can pick.
Ur adopted.
My hopes and dreams.
Give me baby girl names for a pregnant YouTuber.
Which nut is the worst for your diet?
Donuts.
What competition do nuts participate in?
The peanut butter cup.
Why did the boy leave his chestnuts in the rain?
He wanted them rusted.
What happens to a nervous nut?
It cracks.
The cashew called the peanut boring.
The peanut felt very unsalted.
How do you catch an elephant?
Act like a peanut.
Can I ask you a question? Nut now!
If you put ice cream on the nutty brownie, you’re serving it a la mode.
A friend asked what an acorn is.
I said, “In a nutshell, it’s an oak tree.”
"Don’t look! I saw you peeking through the window."
My friend’s neighbor’s house is a real pigsty. There are hogs everywhere wearing neck garments.