Short jokes
My jokes are pretty "bone-arifick," if I say so myself. Hehhehe... Get it?
Why didn't the skeleton cross the road?
Because he was part of the Lazy Bones team!
What’s the hardest part about being friends with a turtle?
Getting them to come out of their shell.
Where do golf players practice?
Near a gulf.
What is an orphan's favorite toy? A mom and dad action figure.
What is an emoticon's favorite dessert?
An emochi. (search up mochi)
Rocks rock and crack!
Whoever put an "s" in the word "lisp" was a jackass!
What games do monks play a lot?
Among Us.
What do you call a Jedi teacher who lives in a forest?
Obi-Wan Canopy
Pickled carrots.
If a chicken flies into the plane and the plane crashes, whose fault is it?
A: The driver's. Chickens can't fly.
The other day my girlfriend asked me to hand her the red lipstick, so I handed her the dog.
What did the mermaid wear for math class?
Algaebra.
Chuck: Do you have holes in your underpants?
Teacher: No, of course not.
Chuck: Then how do you get your feet through?
Looks like McSkillet McKilledIt.
Only one band is capable of affording the insurance on supercars. UB40!
Engineer: I know engineering, and my gut instinct tells me to fix it!
Biologist: I know biology, and your gut instinct is full of shit.
Why don’t alligators grow up to 15 feet?
They only have 4.
Knock it out, you poo-a-loo, go get your loo.