Short jokes
What is the difference between Twitter and this website?
There's no difference.
The emo girl got jealous that her phone died and not her.
My mom told me to go to bed, but then I grabbed a drink and went in their room to say goodnight, and they looked like Adam and Eve on steroids!
Why do orphans live on buses?
They never have a home to stop at.
What do dropouts and Boeing 767s have in common?
They crash and burn.
Your mom is a spy <3, just like in bed.
What's the difference between economy and Vietnamese?
Economy doesn't work.
What does the Catholic Church and Worstjokesever.com have in common?
They're both full of child groomers.
Orphan: Can I go outside?
Coworker at orphanage: Go ask your mom.
Orphan: WAWAWAWAWAW
What is a necrophile's least favorite game?
The Walking Dead.
According to a recent poll, your mother said, "I like the guy who saw the guy who doesn't have a brain!"
What's the difference between Lana Del Rey and Milli Vanilli?
Milli Vanilli won a Grammy.
Your friend is so fat, when he took the group pic, he was the background.
Me: What's the fifth month of the year?
Friend: May.
Me: May deez nuts fit in your mouth?
Me: How do cowboys say hello?
Friend: Howdy.
Me: How do deez nuts fit in your mouth?
Some of you need to go to church. I don't want you in hell with me.
Am I a guard or a guava?
The Lenovo computers at school stopped working.
They had to call an archeologist.
What do you call it if you find an old organ keyboard on the side of the road?
Organ harvesting.
Ever have an Italian sausage in a can?