Short jokes
What are Michael Jackson’s favorite universities?
Brigham Young and Boise State.
I would tell you a time travel joke, but you did not like it.
Which word is also called for women's prison?
"Pridaughter."
Why was Stephen Hawking always like this 🫠?
Because he didn’t have emojis on his computer.
Kid: Knock, knock.
Orphan: Who’s there?
Kid: Not your parents.
Your friend lost his left arm, and after getting out of the hospital, you ask him if he’s OK. He says, "Yeah, I’m all RIGHT."
When a person yells, just laugh and remember that they can’t hurt what’s already dead.
1 "Knock knock."
2 "Who's there?"
1 "Interrupting physicist."
2 "Interrupting who?"
1 "Muon!!!"
I was fuming when I lost my job as a window cleaner, like who built the Twin Towers anyway?
What do you call a male robot who wants to be a girl?
A trans-former.
What do Marshall Tucker Band and Kobe Bryant have in common?
Their last big hit was "Fire on the Mountain."
Why do pirates say, "Argh my Hardees?"
Because that's how you tell when they have the hards.
Your forehead is like a line, it just keeps going.
Why are dogs born with balls?
They were having their stick moment when they got given birth, too.
You know how all zodiacs have hairstyles... well not Cancers.
I like my girls like my coffee: Flat and white.
How many people can you fit in a car?
6 - 3 in the back, 2 in the front, and my nan in the ashtray.
I am always high, welcome to bipolar disorder. LMAO. (Don't bother to like or comment, I just had to say this.)
When you get suspended from school for giving the deaf kid AirPods for his birthday.
I, for one, give President Joe Biden my full support, and anything else he can find in my previously rented gym locker. 🤣