Short jokes
Q. What's a compulsive masturbator's favourite food?
A. Jackfruit
What do sped gymnasts wear?
A Reotard.
Q. What do iPads and Jeffrey Epstein have in common?
A. Kids turn them on.
I have the superpower to predict the past.
What does Joker say when someone gets angry at him for not liking oats?
"Hey, why so cereal?"
I forgot to tell Alicia I saw her mom a couple days ago.
In a porn video!
What does William say when he hurts his toe?
"I wanna scream and shout and let it all out."
How many racist jokes am I allowed to make?
None.
Because I don't make jokes.
Yo momma so slutty, she won't even be offended by this joke.
"Give me a cigarette," the condemned man said.
"I thought you quit," replied the guard.
"I did, but I don't think it matters anymore."
Why is it so hard to play hide-and-seek in an orphanage?
Because nobody is looking for them.
Dating a German is great because they don't play mind games; they just provide a detailed, 40-page PDF explaining exactly why you are wrong.
Putin is so obsessed with territorial expansion, he’s even trying to annex your mama’s bedroom.
History is mostly just a list of things men did while women were busy making sure they didn't die of scurvy.
What color was the plane after it hit the tower?
It was all black inside (Martin Luther King Junior).
You think your friends get butthurt?
That's gay guys.
What did the 12-year-old boy say to the priest?
Nothing, because his mouth was full.
You want to know how to spot a foster kid?
Them carrying their whole life in a Hefty trash bag.
No matter how black the person is, that cum will still be the whitest thing you'll ever see.
If there's a lieutenant, shouldn't there be a righttenant too? 🤔