Short jokes
Did you know a full moon is perfect for a werewolf to come out?
I’m gay.
Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
The dwarf who couldn’t reach the doorbell.
Why did the golfer bring two pairs of socks? In case he got a hole in one!
What do you call a woman who sleeps with multiple men?
A whore.
Abortions are a way for whores to dodge accountability.
It's a joke, not a dick. Don't take it so hard.
Smoking a fag in the UK means to smoke a cigarette.
Smoking a fag in the USA means to kill a homosexual.
"I think my baby is so similar to me!"
"True, but the most important thing is that he is healthy!"
Two needles go to the river. One of them says, "I'm sorry!"
I remember when I saw my dad's penis for the first time.
I said, "Dad, don't text me shit like that."
Plz like.
Did you know that soccer fields aren't made of 4 million crayons? They are actually made from grass. :)
Mexican Comedy Week
Margarita Monday Taco Tuesday Wetback Wednesday Tequila Thursday Fiesta Friday Shake It Saturday Sneaky Sunday
How are rape and an airplane similar?
The ride gets more annoying when the kid starts screaming.
What song did Whitney Houston listen to while doing cocaine?
"Run It!" by Chris Brown.
What do you call a person with Down syndrome in the military?
Special Forces.
Emo grass cuts itself, while transgender laundry hangs itself.
What is the difference between Drake and Carrie Underwood?
Carrie Underwood kissed a 12-year-old boy on the lips.
What did Osama give the Windows on the World restaurant in the WTC as a rating when he ate it? A 9/11!
What is a little zombie's favorite stuffed animal?
It's a deady bear.