Short jokes
My girlfriend called me a pedophile.
And I said, "That's a big word for a 5-year-old!"
Where do short people disappear on the first of December?
Santa's Workshop.
Why don't terrorists like Walmart?
They prefer a Target.
Why is America so bad at playing chess?
They lost two towers.
Why can't Stephen Hawking win any arguments?
Because he can't stand up for himself.
What's an emo's favorite type of necklace? The kind that attaches to a ceiling beam.
What Disney movie does the church make little girls watch?
Snow White and the Seven Deadly Sins.
What is the definition of suspicion? A: A nun doing squats in a cucumber field.
Did you know that good Catholic girls like to WAP?
Yeah, they are all about Worship and Prayer.
What do you get when you cross a Chinese and an Indian man?
A car thief who can't drive.
If Eve sacrificed the human race for an apple, what would she do for a Klondike bar?
WOW! I CAN SEE THE TWIN TOWERS FROM HERE.
What do you call a lazy kangaroo?
A pouch potato.
What do you call a dick?
Suck my dick!
Wanna hear a joke about Alzheimer's? Wanna hear a joke about Alzheimer's? Wanna hear a joke about Alzheimer's?
What would Hitler do if he was in Minecraft?
Mien.
Why did Adolf Hitler wish he had two nuts?
Because he only had one.
What does a sex offender and Santa have in common?
They will come down your "chimney" tonight.
What would a Down syndrome Ben 10 alien be called?
Chromostone.
What do you call a romance movie for Down syndrome people? Chromeo and Juliet.