If you're ever in need of a punching bag, just go to your local Alzheimer's unit.
They'll forget you were there in like three minutes.
Apparently there was a woman from Australia who had sex with 500 men in one day.
That's like a real life "Your mom" joke.
Tell your mom I don't like waiting in queues.
You really seem like you don't want to be laughing at that rape joke, but somewhat ironically, I'm forcing you.
It's a shame Iran doesn't know how to restrain Israel. If only they had Hitler's expertise.
Now he really would be THE FINAL SOLUTION!
Been single for a couple of years and then I met this Muslim girl. She soon put the spark back into things.
How many women does it take to change a light bulb?
None, because they're so DARN STUPID!!!!
Why was Helen Keller so bad at driving?
Because she's a woman.
When we take a family photo, you are the background.
Why can't orphans play baseball? Because they can't find Homeplate.
ISIS recently brought out their own shampoo: HEAD AND SOLDIERS.
Your hairline is so far gone that you could build a runway.
What do you call a Greek necrophiliac?
Con Fuckacarcass.
Your hairline is so far back that it looks like Putin's tanks steamrolled through.
How to escape your black school teacher in detention?
(Easy)
Turn off the lights!
I don't like them white, pale, always talking about death EMO kids!
Sorry, I meant CHEMO kids.
Q. What do you call a biracial kid in a vegetative state?
A. A mixed vegetable.
Q. What do you call a rich person who is in a vegetative state?
A. A loaded potato.
What shows do orphans dream of?
Full House or Fuller House.
If your parachute fails midair, remember, you have the rest of your life to fix it.
