Short jokes
If there's a lieutenant, shouldn't there be a righttenant too? 🤔
If you’re bored, just punch an orphan.
What are they going to do? Tell their parents?
What do you call Mario?
Bros.
Why are people that have bipolar disorder never on suicide watch?
Because they are always sucking dick.
I love vegans because they save more meat for us.
Save the plants, eat a vegan.
What do you and Quasimodo have in common?
You're both hideously ugly and hide in the dark.
What do Woody and Hitler have in common?
Their bodies go limp before they get caught.
You're so ugly that you made Hitler commit suicide.
You remind me of a pencil.
Why?
Because at one time, you actually made a valid point. This time, everything is pointless with you around.
Your taste in men is like my taste in humor: dark.
Dark humour is like skin.
The darker it is, the less people like it.
Why do white people get abducted by aliens?
Because they're easier to see in the dark.
You're so full of shit that you need a colostomy bag to clean you out.
"Tyler teller, come to daddy!"
My superpower is that I can create life.
Bitches ain't shit but hoes and tricks.
The teacher asks me what my favourite word is.
I said it but got told off and sent to the principal.
What is my favourite word?
Q. Why did Michael Jackson cross the road?
A. There was a daycare on the other side.
Why did the terrorist cross the road?
To get to the airport!