Short jokes
What does NASA stand for? Need Another Seven Astronauts.
What did God say when he made Jake Paul?
"Oops, I made a mistake."
What do you get when you cross Donald Trump with Fregley?
Orange juice.
What do you call a retarded Catholic?
Asperges.
The dyslexic devil worshipper sold his soul to Santa.
Friend: If you don't like my bad jokes, I will tell some stand up comedy.
Me: But you are not standing:)
What do you call a mushroom that makes music?
A decomposer.
What is the difference between 100 dead babies and a Mustang Challenger?
I don't have a Mustang Challenger in my garage.
Why did Sally fall out of the swing?
She had no arms.
Why couldn’t she get up?
Because she had no friends.
Kade
A Lew runs into a wall, what does he break? His Nose.
A Mexican runs into a wall, what does he break? His lawn mower.
Wife: I want to deep throat your dick.
Husband: let’s do this.
Wife: April foogjhmgkjgyukgyukfygkutkutkygfku5t!
I got a chicken drum stick for lunch, thought I might drum up an appetite!
What do you call a private nun?
Nun-o-yo-business.
Why was 6 scared of 7? Because 7 was a registered *sex* offender.
What's the difference between a pool and a toddler?
One doesn't scream when you go in dry ;)
Hey, I'm not forcing you to learn the Force.
Why are Muslims terrible at football?
Because every time they have a corner, they build a shop.
Stephen Hawking went on a date and came back with a broken leg. I can't believe she stood him up.
How do you kill a Catholic?
Crucify them...