Short jokes
My German girlfriend likes to rate our sex between 1-10.
Last night we tried anal, she kept shouting 9!
That's the best I've done so far.
I ate a time machine once, it was very time-consuming. Especially when I went back four seconds.
How do you stay warm in a cold room?
You go to the corners. It's always 90 degrees.
When you see a deer, what do you say?
"Oh deer!"
What is the similarity between a joke and food?
Some people just don't get them!
Whenever I see a dog video, I just take a second to press paws.
Jason: Did you hear about the storm-trooper who attempted suicide?
Dave: No.
Jason: Well, he hit his first target.
Q: Why did the teacher die?
A: Because he hated his life.
What do you do when life gives you lemons? Slit your wrist and give a lemon a twist. 🙂💊💉
All you need is a razor blade in life.
What is the difference between a Rubik’s cube and a penis? I don’t know, but they both get harder the more you play with them.
You people are sick!!!!!!!!!!!!!! None of these are funny. Sick sick sick!!!!!!!
What do you call a person with Down syndrome who graduated high school?
Impossible!
I put the sexy in dyslexia.
What did the car say when it crashed? That's wheely unfortunate!
What happened to the man who made too many bad jokes? He served out a cruel and unusual PUNishment.
Thor is so gay he farts the rainbow bridge to Asgard.
A friend was doing bird puns on me. Then I realized that toucan play at that game.
How do Asians name their kids? They drop spoons and forks down the stairs. Chin Chan Chon.
What did the white girl say to the black girl?
"Where's the back?"