Short jokes
My Llama's cousin sucks at going on vacation.
He just stands there; "I'll pack uhhhh...."
Spongebob is yellow, and he can't drive.
Must be Asian.
Two gay guys are in a burning building, who gets out first? The one on the top or the bottom?
The bottom because his sh*t's already packed.
Why can't pirates play cards? Because they're standing on the deck.
Where do leg amputees go to buy a car?
IHOP
Your mom gay.
There is one good part about paedophiles... they go slow in school zones.
I like women how I like my hair dryer: locked in a closet most of the time and only being used to blow me dry.
What did the girl say to the white guy? “You have a peener wiener!”
What's the best part about having sex with twenty-seven year olds?
There's twenty of them!
Why couldn’t the midget talk?
Because someone stepped on him.
A single sentence walks into a bar.
Every moon has a silver lining.
What's the best part of having sex with a baby?
Deep throat and anal at the same time.
What do you call the day before Christmas Eve? Christmas Adam.
What did one traffic light say to the other?
"Stop looking, I am changing."
I hate two-faced people because I don't know which face to slap first.
What do you call it when a watch has too many belts?
A waist of your time.
What did Stevie Wonder's mom do to punish him as a child?
She rearranged all the furniture.
A man bought a brand new iPhone but returned it, why?
The apple was already bitten.