Short jokes
I saw a midget prisoner climbing down a ladder the other day and I thought, huh, that's a little con-descending.
Roses are red, Justin Bieber is gay, But most importantly, You know de way.
A blondie and a redneck jumped off a building. Which one will land first?
The redneck because the blonde will ask for directions.
Why do people think Mozart was autistic?
Because he was probably retarded.
Muslim furries like goats.
Who is Barry B. Benson’s favorite classical composer?
Bee-thoven.
Why did the kid with Down syndrome get expelled?
He was always tardy.
How many astronauts can you fit into a VW Bug? 11, 4 in the seats, seven in the ashtray.
What does NASA stand for? Need Another Seven Astronauts.
What did God say when he made Jake Paul?
"Oops, I made a mistake."
What do you get when you cross Donald Trump with Fregley?
Orange juice.
What do you call a retarded Catholic?
Asperges.
The dyslexic devil worshipper sold his soul to Santa.
Friend: If you don't like my bad jokes, I will tell some stand up comedy.
Me: But you are not standing:)
What do you call a mushroom that makes music?
A decomposer.
What is the difference between 100 dead babies and a Mustang Challenger?
I don't have a Mustang Challenger in my garage.
Why did Sally fall out of the swing?
She had no arms.
Why couldn’t she get up?
Because she had no friends.
Kade
A Lew runs into a wall, what does he break? His Nose.
A Mexican runs into a wall, what does he break? His lawn mower.
Wife: I want to deep throat your dick.
Husband: let’s do this.
Wife: April foogjhmgkjgyukgyukfygkutkutkygfku5t!